Last time I chatted at you about Edmond Dantes and his sociopath ways and how he eventually found true freedom. (Here)
But I left you hanging….
I left out the direct down-to earth biz-nis parallel.
(The fingers gots tired and the coffee ran dry.)
I saw the movie through a business coach’s perspective and past COO.
Eddy made ‘operational’ errors like a sociopath business owner. He thought the only way to his ultimate goal, required him to compromise on who he wanted to be. He got everything he planned for and almost none of the freedoms he wanted.
The goal of a non-sociopath businesses is to have time, location and money freedom, while helping others.
I think you also want this.
However if you enjoying working hard long hours, struggling to make it… please don’t read further.
This will invade your safe-space of hustle and take away your ability to brag about how hard you worked.
Secret sociopath business owners (SSBO) unknowingly create systems that trap themselves and LIMIT their world changing goodness.
And lose their freedom.
They mean well.
Like a child giving a dirty cat a bath.
It is a seemingly good idea that turns tragic from not knowing the nature of the beast.
I once was a SSBO myself, and it nearly killed me.
(A deathly cocaine habit would have been more enjoyable.)
Being an SSBO is deceptively self-imprisoning.
Here is why…
Sociopaths, unlike their psychopath cousins, have a conscience. They do what they do, even if they don’t like it. They think it is the only way to succeed.
SSOBs inefficiently hustle and grind their way to results.
They don’t like the grind.
It is results only.
You can’t really call it a success if the process is killing you mentally, physically or emotionally.
The biggest symptom of a SSBO is they THEMSELVES have to do the specific task.
SSBOs need to prove a point to someone…
** Their loyalty (helpfulness)
** Their importance (influence)
** Their ability (power)
** Their cunning (logic)
and take all the credit
cuz if they don’t….
They THINK they won’t deserve the results.
Let’s see it how it works through a few bits of typical faulty SSOB hustle–n-grind logic:
- “I’m the only one who can do X cus No one is better than me.”
- “If I can’t do it then I can’t ask someone else to do it….”
- “I’m going to prove to myself/father/peer group/ I can do it. (A type of revenge)”
- “Guru Joe did it XXXX way. If I can’t do it the exact same… bahhh what good am I?”
- “I can’t afford to outsource….
(Note: This is why I teach you the Indirect Method to getting things done when you don’t have cash reserves.)
There is nothing lawfully wrong with this kind of hustle-and-grind.
But it does significantly limit your FREEDOM.
Sure, Edmond was super crafty to figure out how to use the law to his advantage. It took him a bazillion years to work out his plan, (loss of time). He was forced to travel to places he didn’t want to go (location freedom). It nearly cost him his entire fortune (financial freedom).
- Worse he had to pretend to be someone he wasn’t.
- Worst he couldn’t share the experience with anyone.
Dantes got mentally right after his right hand man nut-kicked him with the truth.
Dream are only worth having if you can share them.
He was on the edge of getting everything he planned for, but losing everyone he wanted to share it with.
This leads to the practical biz-nes advice……
The operational error with all SSBO mindsets is….
It prevents you from SCALING.
Learning to scale is the only way to have full time, location and wealth freedom.
The only way to scale is to remove yourself and allow others to take over every part of your business. (Of course you can keep doing the parts you really enjoy, if you want to.)
You have to let go of doing it exactly your way
and stop pretending of being something you are not.
You have to get out of the self-imprisonment of hustle-and-grind proving to yourself you can do ALL THE THINGS.
In my experience most scaling problems have to do with ego.
And most of those don’t look like ego at first.
This is why stuck business owners are secret sociopaths. It looks like they are doing the right thing, even if the process sucks ass for them.
For example: “I can’t ask someone to do something I haven’t done at least once.”
It smells of anti-hypocrisy.
But it is a self-centered mentally deranged definition of hypocrisy, forcing them to think they need to be something they are not.
This Pirate has a soft spot for these mentally deranged individuals…
Cuz he knows, they know, the story of this hustle-and-grind is wrong.
They feel it deep in their bones.
***The best of who they are is not coming out.***
It is the ache we all feel while we are an SSBO.
This is real reason for all the self-proving. (Self-improving)
It is the desire to get their best out into the world.
The Pirate sees it in their eyes.
And he knows there is an easier, better, faster path.
One simple question:
Where do you think your business absolutely depends on you?
I Pirate promise you, your next level of freedom is waiting for you right there.
Until Next Monday
(P.S. Being a SSBO is a stage everyone goes through. Recognizing you are one is the first step to freedom)